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About Bamenda

Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but I swear, one chick said she’d only hook up if I barked like a dog—fuckin loco, right? Told her, “I’m Tony Montana, I don’t bark, I bite!” Sex-dating’s a trip, mang—half the time you laugh, half the time you wanna shoot somebody. “This is all we need,” Eve says—nah, I need a chica who don’t catfish me with 10-year-old pics. Stay real out there, or Tony’s comin’ for ya—say hello to my little friend!

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Now, real talk: as a masseur, I see what others miss – sweaty street corners, the way the city’s pulse syncs with my fingers. I once massaged a fella who claimed the local river, River Mungo, was smoother than his pick-up lines. LOL, he was extra. The river’s a ribbon of life sneaking past the busy markets, where locals share fresh gossip and that city energy fuels every bit of art and raw feels around here.

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